2021. The year that changed my life.

July 11th 2021. The day that changed my life. This isn't something which I talk about much on social media however I feel like it is important for me to share my story considering how much it has impacted my day to day life.

On the 11th of July 2021 I suffered a Tibial Plateau Fracture (TPF) from jumping down just 3 steps; I was initially told by a bouncer who apparently had first aid training that it was not broken but that I had torn a ligament. I had been trying to walk on it not realising the extent of the injury (obviously without success), the pain was getting worse so I decided to go to A&E. 4 hour wait. Absolutely no chance I was waiting, I'll come back tomorrow.

That night was the absolute worst night of my life, I cannot even describe the pain I was in, I got about 30 minutes of broken sleep. I called 111 the next day and was told I had to get myself to the hospital as ambulances would take about 6hrs to arrive, luckily I was at my friends house who was a 30 second drive away from a hospital however I was also in a 2nd floor flat with no lift (I was lucky to have someone who was able to carry me up the day before), I had to drag myself down to the ground floor where a cab was waiting for me who was incredibly helpful.

That day was the longest, hardest day of my life. I had been to 2 different hospitals from 8am-8pm getting countless X-Rays, waiting hours, different doctors, different casts, gas and air (which wasn't enough), pain, tears, the list goes on. I was by myself the whole time due to Covid-19 rules, my parents had recently moved up north so they were hours away, I was incredibly lucky to have my best friend and her family come to take me back to theirs afterwards. I honestly broke down the minute I saw her as the only thing I had wanted that whole day was someone I knew, a familiar face to support me through the day.

My break was bad, really bad, which meant I needed surgery, something which made me very nervous as surgeries were never something I had to have nor ever wanted but unfortunately I had no choice and all I wanted was to get better! The surgery was long and I had to stay overnight which was horrible but I got to go home the next day. I had a lot planned for the summer, photoshoots, festivals, birthdays, holidays. That was unfortunately all cancelled, although I was still hopeful that I would be able to enjoy the end of the summer as doctors had told me 6-8 weeks after surgery I would be allowed to fully weight bare. I was very naïve to think like that.

I must admit, those 6-8 weeks were the WORST weeks of my life. I was pretty much bed bound in a new flat with no lift, I lived on the top floor so never got to go outside during those weeks as it was just too hard for me to go up and down those stairs on crutches, I was hours away from my parents, I had to inject myself in the stomach every day to prevent my blood from clotting (I hate needles!), I became very depressed, I put on weight, a lot of people around me were not there to support me when I needed it most, I had lost a once in a lifetime opportunity, the list goes on. I was (and still am) very lucky to have my friends, family and of course Blue to help me through everything, deal with me during the bad days and make me feel 100x better every day. I met my boyfriend a few months later too, he has been my biggest supporter and personal physio!

I am now over 12 months post-op and It's been a very long road to recovery. 2 surgeries with another pending, physio appointments, consults and lots of disappointment. Unfortunately I didn't heal very well, my knee is stuck at a 30° bend which has meant that I currently cannot walk the way I used to nor can I stand up for long hours without being in a lot of pain and I am not sure if I'll ever be back to normal, however, with all these setbacks I have also had many achievements, my first ride back, my first walk, my first festival, going back to the gym and while yes I am restricted, these are still things I thought I wouldn't be able to do for a long time if ever. This injury has completely changed my life and day to day activities which once seemed so simple can sometimes seem like a challenge, I have had to give up a lot of things, I had to rely on others a lot more than before (something which I hate!), I have good days, I have bad days. I'm trying my best to stay positive and hope that this next surgery helps.

I was tired of restricting myself so much hence why I decided to get back to photography and taking on clients, something I didn't think I'd be able to do for a long while however I feel as though I'm finally ready to get back to it. So far, so good, so let's hope we keep moving forward!